Worth The Trip

Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth;
Keep watch over the door of my lips.
Psalm 141:3

I didn’t really want to go, ya know? It was a two-hour drive just to get there. Tickets were pricey! The drive home wouldn’t start until after my typical very early bedtime. I looked for ways to put it off or talk him into something else. But my 11-year-old son has a growing interest in classical music, so recently we went to the Nashville Symphony.

It was a wonderful night! In the lobby he said it was the most beautiful building he’d ever seen, but the look on his face when he stepped into the concert hall itself made it worth the trouble of getting there. He gushed about the music before, during, and after the show. He’s already wanting to go back.

There was one moment though when I almost ruined the whole evening. There was some stress getting out of the parking garage. It took forever to get the scanner to read the QR code on my phone. Cars were lining up behind me, but there was no human to help until the kind lady in the car behind me told me what I was doing wrong. I didn’t consider until afterward that I was verbalizing my frustration about the situation the entire time. Once we finally got on the road my son said dejectedly, “Maybe we shouldn’t have come after all.” Oh, I felt terrible! He was having what he described as the second best day of his life, (second only to the day he got baptized, he said), and I stole his joy by transferring my stress to him. I apologized and told him that it was definitely worth coming. Parking garage stress and similar frustrations are just part of life. I made sure he knew that it hadn’t ruined the night for me, and it shouldn’t ruin it for him. But boy did I learn a lesson.

I also reflected later: what if I had talked myself out of taking him? There were plenty of reasons not to go, but I would have missed such a great night with my son. More importantly, he would have missed out on a joyful and formative experience.

My advice to myself and other parents is this: take them to do the special things now and then. Be responsible but don’t feel guilty if it costs some time or some money. And of course you can have many wonderful experiences without spending a lot or going very far.

It is good to break up the routine every now and then. Adults tend to have general memories of their home and daily life as children, and how they feel about that is extremely important, perhaps the highest indicator of what kind of family life they will produce for themselves and their children. But it seems to me there’s also something important, different, and special about out-of-the-ordinary experiences, whether it be an all-out trip to Disney, or a day of hiking in the woods and having a picnic lunch, or even just jumping in the car once in a while on the spur of the moment to go get ice cream.

But our behavior in the stressful moments is also key to our kids’ future success. If we plan special things but then spend the whole time complaining about the price or the long drive, we are completely undermining the whole thing.

There’s so much beauty in this world. There’s also obviously a lot of stress. There is good and bad. Pleasure and pain. We need to be intentional in teaching kids how to handle both. And of course the loudest lesson is our example.

As a lamb before his shearers is silent, so Jesus opened not his mouth to protest when he suffered (Isaiah 53:7). Yes, he despised the shame, but he didn’t complain. He endured it patiently because he could see what it was accomplishing (Hebrews 12:2). I wonder if the expression on our faces when we first enter heaven will be part of what makes the sacrifice worth it to the Lord.

by Christie Cole Atkins

Dear God, I thank You for my children and for the many opportunities to share the goodness of Your creation with them. Give me wisdom to remember the example I am setting for them and for everyone around me. Forgive my complaining, and help me to draw people’s attention to the good in this world and especially to You, the source of all that is good, and true, and beautiful. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

Related Reading:

When Burdens Turn Into Blessings

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