When You’re Not Good At Praying

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

Imagine a carpenter who builds a foundation for a house, but then lays down his tools and ceases the work. Maybe for a long time. When he decides it’s time to get back to building, would he hesitate to pick up his tools because he feels guilty for all the time he didn’t use them? I don’t think so.

Recently I wrote (linked below) about how, as Christians, even when we don’t know what to do about our troubles, we DO know what to do. We know to take it to God in prayer. But does that mean we do it? Sometimes grief is so stark, it clouds our minds and we literally might forget to pray at first. For some people, praying is easier in times of distress because there is increased motivation. But there may also be believers who feel they are not “good at” prayer, whose prayer life may not be what it ought to be. They may feel guilty about picking up the tool of prayer if they haven’t used it in a while.

Perhaps in those moments they are thinking they don’t deserve to call on God for help because they haven’t been confessing their sins in prayer as they ought; they haven’t been thanking God in prayer as they ought. Why should He listen to them now that they are in trouble? It may even be that pride creeps in, arguing that to pray only in difficult times makes one a hypocrite, and we can’t have that.

Another hindrance for the person not well practiced in prayer could be the inability to find the words. I’m sure Satan must love this bit of circular logic that traps people in a cycle of not praying.

I don’t, so I can’t.
I can’t, so I don’t.

You know what I’m going to say to all of this, don’t you?

Pray anyway.

But how?

First of all you may be inclined to pray the way people pray in the movies:

God, I don’t know if you can hear me, but…

God, I don’t know if you’re up there, but…

These are not great prayer starts for a Christian, even if you aren’t the most faithful Christian around, because James says that if we pray with doubt, we should not expect to receive anything from the Lord (James 1:6-8). If you’re a believer, then believe! “Believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him,” (Hebrews 11:6). Maybe you haven’t been diligently seeking Him in prayer, but you can start right now.

Secondly there’s no need for deal making.

God, if You’ll do this one thing for me, I promise…

God, I’ll never (fill in the blank) again if You’ll just…

If you’re a Christian, you’ve already made a deal with God, one that includes a provision for managing your failures to live up to the deal perfectly (1 John 1:8-9). So by all means, confess your failure to pray and whatever sins may have been keeping you from prayer. But rather than swearing to do this or that in return for His help, thank Him for your blessings and make your requests known (Philippians 4:6). Don’t think that anything you can offer Him somehow evens the score; rather, ask Him to equip you to serve Him better.

And finally, if you’re “not good” at prayer, try praying the scriptures. You don’t need eloquent words to approach God; in fact you barely need any words at all. The Holy Spirit can intercede for you (Romans 8:26-27). But the Bible has a lot of words that you can use if you want, and I believe there is great power in praying those words back to God.

Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve taken up the tools that God has given you, but they’ve been lying there all along. Not using them because you haven’t been using them makes no sense. You know what you need to do. Pick up the tools and get back to building your prayer life. It will please God and be a blessing to you.

Dear God, we know it is only the worthiness of Christ that makes it possible for us to approach You. Deliver us from the snare of Satan when he tries to use our failures to keep us from You. We thank You and praise You that our sins can be forgiven when we confess and turn to You. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

Related Reading: What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do

Praying God’s Word Back To Him